There is a big uproar going in Tamilnadu and some parts of Karnataka over the Godman's sex scandal. Recently, a regional channel aired a sextape of the godman and an actress.

Hindu activists are enraged. Some atheist groups use this incident to emhasise their logic. This so called Godman, Swami Nithyananda who amassed wealth to amount of  multi crores and has ashrams in all over India and abroad.

Now, This swami Nithyananda, [who was enjoying Godlike status before] is suddenly the most-wanted religious cheat!

There are many such sawmijis walking freely in Tamilnadu. Melmaruvathur, Kalki bhagvan, Gold temple Sri swami and the list goes on.

Why anyone needs intermediary to talk to God? These above Godmen call themselves as God's reincarnation! They run hospitals, engineering colleges, ashrams. The one in Sripuram, Vellore, built a temple made of pure gold worth millions! It's now, a famous tourist spot and a spiritual centre in Chennai and Govt dutifully runs exclusive transport for this place! We have enough gods in Hindu religion. Why we need such irritating, cheating and God's reincarnations?? Why such Godmen shamelessly enjoys
such opulent lifestyle? Even with the use of RTI, no one can prove anything against these persons as long as they hide behind the convenient tag 'charity trust' and 'donations'.

It makes me wonder that despite the constant exposure of such cheating godmen, howcome people, especially women still believe in them and their godly powers?'.

Interestingly, even educated women [It's often divorcess, widows, and lonely women] fall prey in large numbers! So, it's obvious that these women are not forced or brainwashed by these godmen. It's of their own will, they go to these godmen!

Why? what lures these modern, educated women to such godmen, who look either barbaric or wimpy at the best of their times???

The lifestyle in Tamilnadu is very curtailing. Socialising happens within few close friends and mostly with relatives. Festivals are often celebrated within families. Even within relatives, women members dont interact with male counterparts except cousins and brothers. Even father-in-laws and Brother-in-laws remain out of this friendly orbit! Dress code is strict. Even salwars are not allowed in family gatherings. Down south is the worst in such matters.

Men are also not spared. But, society makes allowances for men's sexuality whereas Women's sexuality is rigidly overlooked, frowned upon, considered as a bad element! Women's physical needs still get overlooked with such callousness, it's a sheer cruelty!

Why so?

If we look closely, women are passionate by nature. Their sexuality is more rampant than men. Their libido runs higher than men! They think and fantasise about sex more often than men! Their sexual needs is a combination of more than the mere act. A simple 'wham-bham-thankyou' maybe enough for a man. But, a woman relates companionship and security with sex and expects it through physical love. So, women's sexual need is a combination of psychological and physical one!  No wonder women's need for sex slackens only after 60's!

Having such a complex makeup, thriving in a rigid society which makes no room for natural outlet is not an easy task!

Married women, who are not happy or satisfied go lonely, with no one to share their feelings. Society expects them to hang on with their marital  status. Divorce is suicidal. Even innocent, platonic friendship with opposite sex is frowned upon, gossiped and even shunned. Even in Chennai, public transport, men and women dont share seats! Most of the time they act wary of each other.

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written by Pavalamani Pragasam, March 04, 2010

Oh, my God! what an outburst! But why a toned down last paragraph? I am both saddened and amused. Perhaps my observations and experiences in my ripe age make see many of your allegations as misconceptions, umbrella! What are the 'victorian rules'? You call fundamental, moral discipline which differentiates humans from beasts as 'victorian rules'? Are they so bad? Unnecessary? I make no difference between the sexes! Your statement about Indian men lacking 'finesse' in the art of wooing women and men marrying brides arranged brides lacking experience as fumbling novices etc gave me a few hearty guffaws!!! My girl, how wrong you are about the art of love-making needing previous experience! It is an art learnt together, has it not been? Flesh trade and porns are very old. But simple, pure marital bliss is also very old.
You have discovered quite a lot about women's needs for sex! Well, it can be talked on endlessly! A 'spiritual' charlatan and a depraved member of the gliterratti spurring such a vehement outpouring is rather unfortunate; it hides many real facts, vital points about human relationship. mmmm...I can only sigh and feel relieved at the thought of having not too many years to see more brilliant thought revolutions!

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@ Umbrella
written by Administrator, March 04, 2010

My disagreement outweighs my agreement.

1. Married women are not happy? What makes us sure that married males are happy with these unhappy wives? May be fault lies on both sides.

2. Married women who are unsatisfied go lonely? I cannot clearly get the intention behind that sentence. Of course they can discuss the same with their female counterparts.

3. In public transport/places, seats are reserved for females so as to protect them. I dont view it in negative light.

4. Finally, its awkward to relate the beliefs in religion, culture, babas, temples etc is due to the loneliness they suffer or say less degree of freedom.

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written by umbrella, March 04, 2010

@PP - Thank you for ur input. Let me try to explain my view [ accusations?].

1. Victorian rules: A married woman never gets to interact with her Father in law, brother in law. This maybe a right kind of attitude some 30-40 years back. But, today's women well exposed, career women. when they get marry, the whole family maintains a friendly, affectionate terms with her is essential. So that, it wd be easy for her to confide in her in-laws without any qualms. this is such a simple thing. But in the name of moral discipline, this harmless friendliness get refused to her. Let's forget Chennai. Rest of the Tamil nadu follow this rigid rules. can u deny it?

I meant the groom as fumbling novice. NOT the brides. Today's women expect more from their men. It maybe fanciful and unrealistic. but they expect and when the guys fall short..especially when they happen to be a fumbling novice, it creates problems. The problem is in treating sex as some kind of monstrous sin and taboo stuff. when on the one side, the exposure makes people needy and on the other side culture stifles them with 'sin' tag...people get confused, and feel deprived. we cant stop the exposure in any way. so..the only option is to allow certain lenience...isnt it?

As a career person, i get to interact with many other career women and make friends. The more i interact with them, the more i come to know abt their marital problems. Most are sex related with husbands falling short of. some dont have sexual problems..but lonely with only their mom-in-law to interact with. The problems are mounting..escalating everyday. but without an understanding friendly society, amicable solutions are impossible. That's y family courts are overflowing and divorces are happening everyday.

Finally..i love our cultural base and the security it gives. that's y that toned down paragraph! But that does'nt mean i approve some of it's outdated rules. It's causing harms and i wd like to see some changes without collapsing the entire value system!

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written by umbrella, March 04, 2010

@admin - thank you for ur input.

1. women are needy and expect more and men are not experienced enough to handle it and the marital problems start! of course fault lies om both sides.

2.sexual dissatisfaction coupled with loneliness from lack of companionship [ courtesy of fast paced life] cant be 'solved' by discussing it with female counterparts.

3. reserving seats for females! this is where we r blundering! by isolating men and women, the easy, friendly comraderie can never be achieved between them ! instead of isolating them, teaching them how to behave..even within touching distance would be more appropriate..isnt it?

4. Yes. it's a fact that all Godmen thrive on with their over flowing women fan follwing!

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written by Pavalamani Pragasam, March 05, 2010

umbrella, surprised to see you not updated with the changing lifestyles and mindsets- no more 'victorian rules' anywhere- no taboos or reluctance of free interaction with male in-laws for today's women. Your opinion of sex being seen as a monstrous sin seems to be exaggerated. Sex has its rightful, honourable place in all families. An understanding wife makes her partner perform better, an ignorant, perverted wife breaks the peace and pattern of her man's behaviour on bed. It is mainly in her attitude and approach. She has her share in making it enjoyable. Having the fault on her side it is unfair to point the finger at the 'failing' partner! If problems are mounting it is because of our wrong priorities, undue expectations, greedy ambitions and so on. Family courts are overflowing with cases because of the wrong abetting women get from media and friends about her misplaced ambitions and miscalculations about family duties. Women are losing the art of making contentment as the basis of life, the art of wearing their men round their little finger!!! Career women paying a price-an unnecessary one- is my confirmed opinion.
As for separate seats in buses for men and women it is the respect we pay, an acknowledgement we make for the beautiful, sensitive hormone factor which it is not good to desensitise!!!!

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written by Santosh, March 05, 2010

The process of copulation was conceived by the creator with the sole intention of proliferation and sustenance of the human race. The act was made both physically and mentally enamoring so as to provoke indulgence. As life evolved and intelligence multiplied the act started gaining precedent over the motive ….reproduction.
Men and women yearn for complete fulfillment of sexual pleasures irrespective of their marital status or that of their partners but shuns from any commitment thereof. They look beyond their homes to satiate their libido unmindful of the adversity that follow as a consequence. Our culture emphasizes on control over thought and action that is detrimental to the social fabric and our great heritage. In view of the above it is imperative that men and women, notwithstanding societal restrictions / inadequacies in their mate, needs to exercise greater restraint.

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its the attitude that allows!
written by Jithesh Lakshmanan Marar, March 10, 2010

Rules did/does/will stay to exist but only to be the blacks on white. Practicing them are done at will & wish. Nothing less than morality can help us and this "less tasty" ingredient is now as scarce as the existence of dinosaurs on earth. People seem to be happy practicing options that are but only comfortable unto themselves regardless of its moral value. This just helps one to understand the depth of morality that was injected during the upbringing days. If it was indeed fed and now not practiced, credit should go to the lazy, comfort only loving attitude. We can change, provided we have an attitude to change. People need to get less-lazy, to toil, to understand the sweetness of placing efforts, to be contended with things in hand, until then this topic would stay to be one that's open and always easy to write on.

People want things to happen in a jiffy. No more open ended questions, and decisions are made on few closed ended ones. None exhibit the willingness to practice an ounce of patience. "I Just want it" if not "This is not the right one for me" is the proffered statement. Mothers endorse this and fathers endorse this and our brothers and sisters endorse this. There is hardly a question of "what I must do to get it" or at the least "should I be doing something to get it". It seems life has been too easy to all that one seldom wants to work on anything to get it. What can help us, I am afraid I am still observing more of the world for my answers.

I am not sure if I have an answer for who creates Godmen but let me try. Humans love addiction and the state of being mindlessly addicted. There are very few addictions available that would allow one to stay away from being criticized or condemned. Addiction to God through God men is an allowed and infact an endorsed addiction. Endorsed by whom? Only but by the society. This need for addiction does create an area of opportunity. Areas of opportunities when presented would definitely be explored. Isn't business built on presented areas of opportunity? They are and so they did.

My suggestion, people if you are looking for an addition, please look to choose a more creative choice

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written by Teendudes!!, March 11, 2010

Hi dude,

Thanks for your comment on my blog. Read your blog and the theme taken and the way it was dealt, was good. Now the society is changing its attitude towards women. They are no more looked upon as a Sexual object, but the society has realized how meaningless life will be without women. So, the trend is changing definitely and the lustrous persons like Nithyananda should be punished, so that the development of society will never be interrrupted.

Cheers,
Teendudes!!

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written by S.R.Ayyangar, March 28, 2010

People, specially women become more spiritual and religious expecting miracle in their stressful or devastated life through these God men who try to exploit their beliefs and need.That is why some people offer crores of rupees as offerings to God but fail to do anything for the people on street.Its a vicious circle and as long as people are superstitious, this God business will thrive .
You can also read my take on these God men in my article "A-certificate for Ashrams" on my blog.

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written by Raja M, April 12, 2010

Excellent take on the issue. I may not agree with everything you've said, but I do agree that you have captured at least one aspect of it pretty well.

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