In our life several times we come across situations, phases where we are stuck in circumstances. We are counted upon by our loved ones to behave in a predictable manner. We have to act with decorum and play it fairly. Of course there shall be barricades, hardships, but we have to conduct ourselves and shape up. Is this all so easy? Many a times it is really a dilemma when we can't really be egocentric and prejudiced. Sometimes it becomes very difficult to choose a path, to come up with something concrete. One such scenario, i would like to discuss with my readers. 

 The situation arises with the most habitual, regular routine of our lives, Marriage. In fact this dilemma is in pre marriage days. Yes, it's the dilemma of an Indian girl when it comes to marriage. The perplexed and bewildered Indian girl has a tough time before marriage. Be it love marriage or arranged marriage a girl's enigma is always the same though might be in different flavors. Let me be a more specific and confined to arranged marriages.

Once a girl crosses the minimum age bar fixed by the Govt. of India, each and every parent starts with the much awaited job of their life, “planning for the marriage”. To pursuit a good life partner for their daughter, parents ensure they put in their best. Engaging all the relatives, their well wishers, mediators, parents do their best for the daughter's life. The process starts with something like, taking snaps of the girl in a best looking stance, creating a suitable profile for the girl in the best of matrimony sites, updating relatives and middleman with girl's horoscope and photos etc etc. Slowly these efforts become fruitful with people contacting the parents for more details and further meetings. This starts going into a completely different phase of life both for the parents and for the girl. Every time a guy comes to see the girl, it's a kind of appearing for the IIT entrance test for the girl. List of rules to be followed before opening the question paper itself! A minimum of 15 people(12 experienced aunties are must) are gathered before the guy arrives. Tips, starting from how to smile, how to walk into the room, how to talk, how to serve, till what to speak, everything is well practiced. As if the girl has come to the civilized humane society for the first time. Anyways can't help it though. Precautions are taken so that nothing goes wrong and the girl gets a clear Pass mark. If everything goes fine and the girl is being accepted, then well and fine. Or else again the job gets executed. Also if the girl likes the boy, no issues, otherwise it's a carnelian dilemma for the girl. It's so difficult to come to a decision at this point of life. Whether to believe whatever is happening is good or not. Whether to accept the choice of the parents and take the biggest risk in the game of life or not. This is a kind of hob sons choice or the girl to take.

It's no more funny here. Definitely the girl has faith in the parents, but how much the do the parents know about the guy? After all he is a stranger for them as well. Sometimes, it also happens that the guy may be the best possible option, but the girl might still not like him. End of the day its not only “Good ” or “Bad” that matters, it's also “did she like him” or “NOT”? This is what is more important. Most of times, parents do not see for traits rather they go for criteria like, education, occupation, security, family etc. No doubt these are all important factors in life, but isn't it most essential that the girl likes the guy? They say once you start staying together you'll like him. But why do we have to take a risk and check when we are not really ready to take such chances even with our shampoos? The pressure leads to an adverse effect on the girl. At a point when parents become rigid, the girl starts feeling am I some sort of clog or misfortune for my parents? Yes that's when it starts hurting.

No matter how much ever we might have moved on in this modern technical world, our emotions with these situations will always remain the same. No matter how much modern Indian girl has advanced, this dilemma, of going with her own happiness or parent's happiness, will always be a difficult step to be taken. It's a mutual decision to be taken, which should be in accordance with both the parent and the daughter. Hopefully both decisions lead to the same person in every girl's life, that is what i would call as a “Happy ending”.

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